Making Dreams Come True
I’ve been thinking recently
about three stages I’ve passed through in making dreams come true:
DREAMS STAGE
As a college student (and
through much of my 20’s) I simply “dreamed dreams.” I was idealistic, full of hope and dreamed of
making a difference in the world. I
could “see” myself in my dreams like running a DVD in my mind. I dreamed of one
day writing a book or of hiking the entire Appalachian Trail. The dreaming was
good—for without a vision how would I know where I wanted to go. But none of
these dreams came true. Nobody told me (or somehow I never listened) that a
person’s dreams seldom come to you—you have to go to them. I just waited around for God to “make my
dreams to come true.” Nothing happened.
GOALS STAGE
Then in my late 20’s I made
friends with a missionary named Paul Swauger. He was
“an older guy” (in his 40’s) and we started a “discipleship breakfast”
together. At one of those breakfasts
Paul opened his Day Timer and showed me a series of little colored cards he had
made. He had listed his dreams but he had for each dream a dozen little cards
of goals he was attempting to accomplish in order to realize his dreams. I
think he had a color-coded set of cards listing goals in a more than half-dozen
areas of life: spiritual, reading, family, writing, saving, giving and maybe
one or two others. Paul’s disciplined system of goal-setting left me
speechless. I wasn’t ready for goal-setting
yet… I preferred dreaming pipe dreams to doing the hard work of goal-setting.
Every week I faithfully “held Paul accountable” for his goals but I never set
any goals for my own dreams. Paul made progress toward his dreams. I simply
waited for God to miraculously make my dreams come true. He didn’t.
Then in my mid 30’s I joined
an “accountability group” (actually it would be called “mentoring” today) with
Dick Wynn, who was the head of YFC. Dick
introduced me to goal-setting on steroids. He made me write out a specific
mission for my life, describe burdens I felt, and do an analysis of my
strengths, resources, and callings before detailing lifetime goals, five year
goals, one year goals and finally monthly goals (to be accountable for in our
next meeting). It was an elaborate “life arrow”[1] process. By
my late 30’s it finally dawned on me that if I wanted to write a book I would
have to set tiny goals for each week—like “write ten pages this week” if I was
ever going to accomplish the bigger dream.[2] For more than 15 years I followed this system
faithfully before moving to the next stage.
HABITS STAGE
After a decade of
Goal-setting-with-Accountability I discovered two things: 1) I seldom
accomplished all of my goals and 2) I accomplished little that was not listed
as a goal. During that decade I learned that
“if you don’t schedule it, it seldom happens.” I learned that I would
have to set a day aside to write if I wanted to be a writer. I learned if I
wanted to be a good dad I’d have to simply schedule time with my sons like I
was scheduling a speaking engagement—and when someone called to invite me to a
conference I would have to say “I’m busy that day.” A decade of goal-setting produced a habitual
schedule that accomplished goals and dreams. In fact, after 15 years I quit setting goals!
I’ve not done much goal-setting after age 52… by then I had established the
habits of life that made dreams come true.
I no longer set goals to write one day a week—it “just happens” because
it is on my schedule. Since age 51 I have scheduled a month every summer to hike…so
finishing the Appalachian Trail (and several other trails) “just happened.” My
habit of saving and giving is so much a part of life now that I don’t need
accountability to make me accomplish these goals—they “just happen” because
they are a part of my budget and schedule—they are who I am now. The same is true for spiritual goals,
mentoring goals, and eight others areas I still have tucked away in my wallet
(on a tiny card like Paul Swauger had!).
My two observations are
simply this: People with dreams who
have no plans/goals seldom accomplish their dreams. It
takes the hard work of goal-setting and scheduling to accomplish our dreams. My
second point is, that after a period of goal-setting a person gets “into the
habit” of scheduling life toward dreams and visions. Once the schedule takes
over, accomplishment “just happens.” At least that’s how it happens for me.
So, what about your
dreams? Do any of these stages relate to
you or is this only my own experience? What do you have scheduled that now “just
happens” because it is a part of living?
How have you accomplished your dreams? What is still unfinished?
So what do you think?
During the first few weeks, click here to comment or
read comments
Keith Drury January 12, 2010
[1] Some of the process of the “Life Arrow” is currently being continued by two people I was privileged to later lead through the process, Tim Elmore of EPIC Leadership and Steve Moore of the Missions Exchange.
[2] By doing the hard work of goal-setting I discovered that some of my dreams had to by put on the shelf for the time being—left to be dreams. I had two children at home and worked year-rou8nd—how could I ever hike the Appalachian Trail? So I shoved these dreams into a category marked “Maybe Someday.”